I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
