I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
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