Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
