I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Randomize
