Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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