and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I wish you could order shots online.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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