Christians are straight up FREAKS
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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