i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize