Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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