you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Randomize
