the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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