and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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