god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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