I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
