Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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