I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize
