Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Randomize
