He disabled his match.com account in front of me
i barfeds in our rink
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Life without a bra equals bliss.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
