theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
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