Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
