Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
