did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
