question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Less talking, more tequila
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Randomize