no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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