i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Randomize