You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
