I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
