she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I smell like Dick and happiness
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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