oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
