thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
