I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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