You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
