i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
