Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
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