thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
