I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
