we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
