You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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