I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize