We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
