It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
