hell yes lets make some ravioli
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
