Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
