After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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