I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
