I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
