we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
