Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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