I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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