Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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