What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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