At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
